not your average idjit

I did. I didn’t even mean to. She called and wanted to have us purchase vases and flowers for the tables at our "reception". Considering our reception isn’t more than 6 card tables set up in the garage of a friend’s, I decided that centerpieces really weren’t neccessary. It completely threw her into a tizzy.

Soooo. The wedding is Friday. My kid has finally settled down from his transitional crabbiness. The marriage license has been purchased. 4 dozen cupcakes have been ordered. I have a borrowed veil and a bouquet. I still have no clue what I’m wearing.

I’m a pre-school teacher. I always get the kids back to their folks at the end of the day alive AND they have both learned something new and they’ve had fun in the process. I enjoy my job, I love every last one of my little charges and I handle minor disasters, runny noses and messy pants with aplomb. And I get paid virtually nothing. Really.

I’ve tried bolstering my meager income with tutoring (which I am also quite good at…) but can’t seem to get a gig. I’ve actually had a number of calls from parents who decide after speaking to me that tutoring would be too much for their academically failing/floundering child what with football practice and all…groan…can you believe it???

Tomorrow I’m getting some flyers out for a new gig. Perhaps I can find an over-worked suburbanite who might hire me as a Holiday Party Planner. It sounds like a fun job…surely if I can plan a fulfilling, educational, fun 10 hour day for ten 3 year olds I can plan a Christmas party for a couple dozen adults.

This wedding of mine which was once going to consist of me, Michael, my pastor and a couple witnesses rummaged up last minute has turned into insanity. I have been asked to wear bridal garb so that it’s more exciting for the 40 pre-schoolers in attendance. My flower girl is insisting upon wearing a Snow White costume. Live music is in the works…I’m hoping to have "All you need is love" played, and I’m expected to procure 60 cupcakes to feed the masses.

My house is still far behind schedule. As of today, the frame for the lower level is up. That’s it. We are supposed to be in at Christmas time. No way could they possibly get the thing finished by then…nor would I want them to "rush" either.

Tomorrow night we head North to rescue my son. I can’t wait to have him in my arms again. Sleeping is quite out of the question. I need a great quantity of margaritas. Oh yeah. Yesterday at nap time, my cute little flower girl informed me that my teeth are yellow.

I call my son every week to check on him and tell him I love him. Last night when I called my ex said he was sleeping and it was only 7:30. It turns out my son has been very sick for the past week, in and out of the doctor’s office and even spent Saturday night in the ER. I’m furious. I really should have been informed of this. He says the docs aren’t sure, but they THINK it’s the flu and that he’s just having a tough time kicking it. Then he goes on to say that Luke was having alot of trouble keeping food down and that they were giving him Motrin for fever…ARGGHHH!!! Luke can’t handle Motrin. His tummy just kicks it back up. No wonder he was having trouble keeping food down. I’m just a pissed off mama bear right now.

Went off to one of those parties "for women only" tonight. It was amusing as always. Ate some stuff, drank some stuff, played with stuff and bought some stuff and then came home early with a headache. Guess I’m getting old. The party was at my co-worker’s boyfriend’s house. It’s way back in an area I’ve never driven through before. A rather nice place, actually.

Bedtime for me. Night y’all.

The other day I decided to bump up my workout by trying a more challenging pilates workout. Let’s just say here and now that I must be a supreme idjit.

I found myself lying on the floor, on my back, sweating, grunting and wiggling like a beached whale because my abdominals are too weak to get my body to do what they were supposed to do. When Michael walked in, he asked me if that was what I was supposed to be doing. I could have strangled him with my pilate bands at that point.

Since that workout my abs have been so sore that it hurts to do just about everything. I think I’ll back it down to the beginner workout today.